Its been ages since I found the time or energy to post. Or had anything particularly worthwhile to say. So here’s an update. In the past few weeks:
First I was on 2 weeks bed rest.
Then M came down with a crazy fever which the doc thought was H1N1. NOT a fun time.
X then caught the same flu bug. Two sick boys and one pregnant me. Just glad its behind us.
June holidays rolled around, and we went to Phuket which was our first family holiday. It was nice except for M’s terrible overindulgence of Thai food and french fries on Day 1, which led to a bout of constipation and subsequent refusal to eat ANYTHING the rest of the trip. So we went through milk formula like water.
M has formed a strange bond with X, and refuses to go near anyone else when he’s with Appa. Including me. Which I am TOTALLY pleased about. Thinking of how to sic no.2 on X as effectively.
I am absolutely exhausted from being huge and having to care for M. Its the little things, like bending down to pick up toys, that completely wipe me out. I had a little flash of clarity last week – after I had bathed M, made his lunch, fed him and cleaned the flat. I just lay winded on the couch as he watched me. M totally wanted to play, but I was struggling just to stay awake, and couldn’t even read a story to him. Wiped.Out. And I realised, this was what I was going to end up doing for the next few years, cooking and cleaning and struggling to stay awake while I miss out on any actual meaningful interaction with my kids. I try, but seriously, housework is not a core competency. I’ve decided to make peace with this fact, and we are looking into hiring a full-time helper. I don’t think my boys ( or X) will particularly appreciate me martyring myself. I will probably have to go back to full-time work once Baby E is 6 months old – now THAT is giving me sleepless nights. I don’t want to miss out on anything in his growing up years. The best part of staying home with M is seeing his amazing character develop daily. Plus, I can read him like a book – which averts SO many disasters. Even as I type this, X has come in to show me M’s bottle teat which the kid has neatly bitten in half before going to bed. Who does that??! So I’m praying for wisdom to proceed.
Hopefully its not another few months before the next update.
